1. |
Gaze
02:15
|
|||
|
Gaze into the mirror
my wide-eyed reward
shines as if the stars
had emitted some warmth
especially for me.
How gifted must I
truly have been to received
such a tender loving gift?
Yet in this universe,
nothing escapes entropy.
Do the stars themselves live such lives in vain?
How hopeless a thought to silently retain.
Ruminate over worth of this bodily constraint,
Exhausting every semblance of existence I maintain.
How lightless the canopy of headspace I regain
Force wide open eyes
but they, rebounding, droop
frozen as the stars
had emitted some chill
especially for me.
Set myself to pause
meanwhile, inoperably
praying that the stars
would emit a mercy
divinely sent for me.
Gaze into the mirror
my wide-eyed reward
dazzles like the stars
had emitted some heat
especially for me.
How gifted must I
truly have been to received
comfort from their crackling gift?
But in this universe,
nothing escapes entropy.
|
||||
2. |
Axis of Reason
04:12
|
|||
|
waiting for my
nausea to subside
without the hatches
i know and self-provide
might i dare burst forth and step outside?
could the sharpening of sight
settle up my restless mind?
conjuring what I
can't yet define
but i know myself so well
my instinct to survive
is well attuned and spry
is it martyrdom, this road most high?
calibrated too sensitive to
bear a weight, and anything throws me
from my axis and its reason
thought occurs and i i cant even
please my little feral inner child
that hates itself and acts so wild
it breaks from its restraints
tapping feet, waiting for
agitations ease
what if i conciously
were slower to please
myself
i might just burst through that door and step outside
could the trusting of a tide
settle up my restless mind
reflex to negate
so well attuned and spry
|
||||
3. |
||||
|
is this a cold-hearted world?
this is the cold-hearted world.
scrape & crawl for lost rewards,
now what does that truly entail?
chains of food, or iron clasps
this is The cold-hearted world
my primal instincts overrule
the eager flint from which I spark
am i capable of empathy?
i once was so,
but now, am lost
in selfish wheels,
that every single thing,
turn turn turn
is this an unworthy world?
no, this is a blessed earth
rolling seas and flourishing
i am unworthy of its womb
this is a cold-hearted race
and built my cold-hearted place
i only have myself to blame
for every failure i became
and every hell that i create
i kick and spit simply because
i am an escapist
as much as i confuse the term
with glamor and the good times
missing good times simply because
i choose to chase but never find
and fail to conquer anything
i missed the good time every time
|
||||
4. |
Compass
01:57
|
|||
|
why do i expend
this warm ambition north
in thin air it’s devalued
regardless of effort
were it weak or strong
to string myself along
on wisps of imaginative
trails i hike to subsequently fail
at the southern base intention held-
to do a person right.
when i knew i should have left
i set my sights to east
yet settle inwardly to west
which makes for an inevitable
organ-wrenching twist
|
||||
In Deepest Sleep New York, New York
Angelica M. Rodriguez
DIY
NYC
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